It is not about children for me. It is about what do I want to do since I am sick of what I have been doing for a career. Successful, yes, but life is short and I want to try something else.
Have you had these thoughts, too?
I know the economy is challenging but I am a go getter. I don’t want to volunteer since I have done that for years. I want more meaning and new friendships. Just like partners don’t last, friendships need a break up too.
Where do you meet new friends? I don’t golf.
I just am interested in what new careers some of you have explored and how did you begin? I thought of helping out for a day to see if I like that career.
I am an attorney. I thought of teaching.
Friendships seem scattered now. I want to add new connections and see if they grow into more meaningful friends at this time of my life. We don’t have the same interests or giving to each other.
Have any of you gone through these changes with work and friendships? I love to travel but that won’t do it for me as far as fulfillment.
Thank you,
Isabelle
Natalie Caine, M.A. natalie@lifeintransition.org
My situation is a little different, I have gone on permanent disability, so I no longer have a job. After years of working and raising my children. I feel at a loss. Both my children are away at University and although I am very proud and excited for them. I miss them terribly. I am 48 and family members tell me I am lucky to be retired so young and not to have the responsibility of small children. Like you say friendships seem scattered now and I do not even know where to begin at finding some new friends. I find that I am becoming my mother just talking to store clerks and perfect strangers, in order to amuse myself. I too am searching for fulfillment, but don’t see any options.
You being a lawyer, could definitively teach and if I were in your shoes, I would certainly try it. Perhaps take on teaching part time and see how you feel about it. You would meet people perhaps some with the same interests as your self.
Dee
Hi Isabelle,
I can certainly sympathize with how you are feeling as, in the past, I had many of those same thoughts and feelings.
I am educated to a Master’s Degree and managed a hospital laboratory for over a decade, but then felt the need to make some major changes in my life.
My advice to you is to take it slow and examine each piece of your life and put it into perspective. I did not do that. I just assumed that if I changed careers it would solve everything. What I found out, after a bout with major depression, was that there were several areas of my life that needed work.
I eventually did make a career change, and have been happy that I did. However, the road was not easy and It took years to find something that worked well for me.
I do think you should explore some of your ideas such as teaching, but I would explore it slowly and in an area that you are already comfortable such as some branch of law. If you don’t want to teach at the law school level, I would check into teaching a law course for business majors (I took admin. law for my Master’s in Public Admin) as it might be a nice change.
A law degree should give you a lot of options.I know a lawyer who works in the financial aid offices of a University and some who work as financial advisors for various companies. You also could check non-profit organizations, ect…my real advice is just to proceed slowly and with calculated risk.
I truly wish you the best!
Thank you so much for your comments. I have just found this site and am so relieved to read what I am reading. Just such a relief. I have been so lost–and so many comments I have read are making me feel that I am not alone. I am grateful to see that other people are struggling with trying to find there place now–I am a nurse–for 33 years–and would like to do something else too–have thought about teaching–lots of things seem so much different in my life now and I am looking, as it seems, at things for the first time–or at least, for the first time in about 40 years. Thanks again so much!
I am a single mom of three kids, twins 21 and 16. I am miserable. Absolutly miserable. My twins are successful college graduates or almost, (one graduated in three years and is in grad school) and my entire life has been about my kids. I did go to college and have two degrees in counseling but since i was 35 have been on disability for fibromyalgia. I took care of both my parents until they died and now there is just me and my four dogs. Im going out of my mind.
I dont volunteer because my mother always said to me its for people that cant GET a real job. That has stuck with me and though i know it is not true it makes me feel wierd. I want to help people and believe me i have in my past.
What the heck do i do for the rest of my life. Ive done everything i want to do.I dont want to do anything! I like reading, I understand the kids have their own lives now and thankfully they are close to me and call me and text every day. Don’t people just feel like they want to die?
I can not find happiness in a thing. I sit and watch tv and go online and i cant get passed this. I never ever thought about retirement or empty nest in my life. I guess i was very naive and thought i would be married and working forever. Now im miserable. Can anyone help me here? Living on $850 a month is all i have though when we sell this house of my parents i will have a small chunk of money. I’m so lonely.
barb