best transition ever: grandparenting
natalie today show

with Natalie caine

PARENT AND ADULT CHILD STRUGGLES

October 20, 2006 | by Natalie Caine | One Comment

My daughter

One Response

  1. Jane McCauley says:
    October 23, 2006 at 7:13 pm

    OMG, this sounds just like me! I can imagine my daughter saying those very words. Although I let her do the calling. . . I know I ask too many questions. She tries to be nice about it, but she says, ‘Why are you so interested? It makes me angry and I’d like to say ‘Who do you think you are? But I don’t. I actually think I have a right to know what she’s doing. It will take a long time for me to get past this one because we’ve always discussed everything. But, now she doesn’t want to and it makes me suspicious about what she’s doing. I check her cell phone records to see if I recognize numbers, but they’re all new friends. I check her ATM withdrawals hoping to get a clue. I’m driving my husband crazy and it’s getting to the point that we don’t talk about how she’s doing because I can’t discuss it without getting emotional. So, if I can’t talk to him about it, who? My sister across the country asks how I’m doing and I don’t even want to start, although she would sympathize. Her girls are 7 & 8 so she has no idea. I find myself thinking of the moms of my daughters friends who graduated last year and wonder how they’re doing. I need to see them, but don’t know how to approach them. I’m still surprised at myself. . . I thought this would be no big deal and it’s kicking my butt. The only positive thing is that I have bad days and good days. I’ve started trying to think of humourous responses to questions that I know will be ask of me during the holidays, but nothing comes to mind, just a big lump in my throat! My brother-in-law actually asked me the other day ‘if I missed her! At that point I thought ‘which would be quicker, overdosing or a bullet in the head’. Not for him, but me! Get me out of my misery! Oh, I’m doing fine!
    Jane

    Reply

Join conversation

Natalie Caine, M.A. natalie@lifeintransition.org