best transition ever: grandparenting
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TRYING AGAIN TO CONNECT IN THE EMPTY NEST

July 20, 2006 | by Natalie Caine | 2 Comments

Sitting outside in the comfy star held night with three women from the east coast conference, the topic was confusion about how to connect with new people since there is so much summertime playful energy.
One woman said it so well.

2 Responses

  1. Jane McCauley says:
    September 5, 2006 at 2:52 pm

    I am so grateful that I found you, I thought I was the only one with these feelings of grief and loss. I look forward to reading and commenting in the future. Thanks, Jane

    Reply
  2. CJTrailer says:
    September 23, 2006 at 1:52 pm

    I recently experienced the “empty nest” syndrome through my gilfriend who as a single parent, did an outstanding job of raising and “launching” her three children (two sons and a daughter).
    Although somewhat “indirect”, it still affected me as my girlfriend apparently underestimated the impact of her daughter’s (her youngest) leaving for college. I think she was more focused on the logistics of getting her into college than she was in anticipating the consequences of so doing.
    She is now experiencing many normal feelings associated with this transitional life-phase and as part of that has asked me to allow her “alone time”. She’s now saying things like, “I need time for me…I have to do this for myself…I need me and to find me.” I feel badly for her and feel like “collateral damage” in being shut out of her life–hopefully, only during this time of transition (which is a term that means “temporary”).
    I’m so glad to have found this web site. Even though I am a marriage-family therapist, as a “boyfriend”, I am experiencing feelings of helplessness to be able to assist my girlfriend during this time when she has asked me to simply give her time and space; I’d prefer to be more active in that support, but, of course, I am honoring her request.
    She is an amazing professional woman (a managing nurse) who raised these children on her own as a single parent, so it figures that she feels she must make this adjustment on her own.
    Still, this web site has taught me how normal her feelings are and this is really not about me at all. I’m hopeful this transition for my girlfriend will pass sooner than later.

    Reply

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Natalie Caine, M.A. natalie@lifeintransition.org