A father shared with me on the telephone that in two months, his son will be thousands of miles from home.
He notices that moms are better at chatting and repeating their feelings. He sees articles about moms saying goodbye, but little support for the dads.
He is hurting because he too loves his son, of course, and will miss the everyday connection.
School games will end: Driving to events together: Homework at the kitchen table. Photos at parties and bowls filled with dips and chips and loud kids and hoops in the driveway banging with basketballs and even volleyball. He loved reading to him at bed time. He gave him chicken soup when his stomach ached. He caught him shaving in the bathroom with the door slightly open.
He asked me to post here: DADS PLEASE COME ON BOARD AND TALK ABOUT WHAT’S UP. He is proud of his son. He feels the missing out of what he didn’t have as a young kid. He wonders how he and his wife will connect when they aren’t interrupted by kids as their commonality, their bond.
Anonymous dad seeking other dads to talk about WHAT’s UP on the COUNTDOWN to GOODBYE.
Take care,
Natalie
800-446-3310
Los Angeles
www.emptynestsupport.com
Change is inevitable. Get Ready. Get Support.
Natalie Caine, M.A. natalie@lifeintransition.org
Hi,
Thank you for such a wonderful website! I am struggling with what I believe to be a premature version of Empty Nest Syndrome – I am divorced and my 14-year-old son has chosen to live primarily with his father with the exception of alternating weekends and dinner once/week with me. He and I have a fantastic relationship and his reasons to be with his dad have primarily to do with the location of his friends. I live much further away (20 minute drive) fron his friends’ homes which makes it difficult for my son to interact with them when at my home.
I relate to the comments the father posted here in that I am already grieving the loss of the every day connections, bedtime, mealtimes, just chatting about each other’s day. I am so afraid I will lose touch with my son, lose the wonderful relationship we have built. I love my son very much and want to stay connected to him as much as possible, though at the same time want to honor his desire for independence and all-important time with his friends. I become teary-eyed everytime I discuss this :)! Even though he has told me he is very, very happy, I am going through a very private struggle letting him go.
Thanks for your support!