with Natalie caine

January 11, 2010 | by Natalie Caine | No Comments

YOU HAVE YOURSELF!

I think it was Pablo Picasso who stated, “All you really have is yourself.”

When we are younger, our circle of friends and gatherings are larger. That does not mean we don’t long for those friendships and events.

Parts of us want that life style and other parts don’t. We carry both all our life. So don’t kill off the inner parts that have a voice.  They trigger what matters to us in the MOMENT.

When a client of mine went to a party it reminded her that parties were the norm when she was first married with little ones. She misses that now that her children are gone from home. She decided to have a pot luck party in February and notice how she feels.

Gatherings, travel, movies, lunch with a friend, classes, can stimulate parts of you that feel flat. I remember years ago, a teacher saying to me, it doesn’t really matter what you choose to do this weekend, just go do something and see what happens.

Choose an activity that ATTENDS TO YOU, not your worries and shoulds: a walk in an area you haven’t explored, a book signing, hiking, a massage, a golf lesson, a meditation class, a cooking class, an art opening or art class.

Try what might be fun and leave if it isn’t or don’t go back.
Nothing is forever except you being with you. You matter. Get to know who you are and aren’t and then reach towards fun.

I took some friends to a playground where children were climbing, running, chasing and snacking.  We sat with coffee and talked about what came up for us.  We honestly were glad those care-taking days were over. There were flutters of great memories and the idea that it could be fun for a couple of hours. (DREAMS OF BEING GRANDPARENTS) More than those thoughts, we watched to see how happy and playful those children were and to use that image to feed our PLAYTIME IN ADULT LIFE.  We had come to a place of loving our NEW FREEDOM and it was not like that when our children first left home. We cried when we passed a playground or school of parents and children. Rarely do those tears drop now.

Pick something fun and write it on your calendar this week.

Take care,
Natalie
natalie@emptynestsupport.com
818-763-0188 Los Angeles