A woman called softly saying, “Covid, is winning. I can’t, even though January, begin anything. Kids left, husband left, best friend left, work is unfulfilling. I can’t.”
She is not the only person calling with anxiety and grief. When life doesn’t give you what you thought you would have by now, it hurts. Really hurts. Covid and winter are keeping some at home even more isolated. The uncertainty has not become easier to live with. Why would it?
We chatted for an hour. Two practices emerged for her to do at home. Play music louder than you usually do and lay on the floor with a blanket, paper and pencil, and the softest Kleenex. Notice thoughts going by, body sensations, feelings. Notice. Breathing deeply five times. Rest. Repeat. Write anything, an image you saw, thoughts, feelings, wants, anger, why me, etc.
Then put on different music. Repeat activities. This is just a short practice. You don’t have to know what it means, what it did for you, or what’s next. I will share that when I have done this with a group or one or by myself, just the pause from the day and doing this, is worth it.
I am so sorry for the pain. I am so sorry you don’t have someone right there with you, holding your hand, inviting you to bundle up and go for a walk with them. Then the pause of warm tea back home.
Be gentle with yourself.
Natalie Caine, M.A. email@example.com